Dear Mr Barton,

Forgive me writing to you at your home address but I appear to be getting nowhere by writing to Hangar 89 at Luton Airport. My first effort was sent to ‘Customer Services’ on the 4th June, my second ( on rather fetching orange notepaper ) was addressed to you direct on the 24th June – they are both attached. These were serious issues that I was addressing  –  to have them completely ignored is just outrageous, and very poor manners indeed.

Please give these letters your attention. I would prefer a written response but I suppose you could send me an email.

I gave up my membership at Sunningdale when they doubled the subscription to £60 a year and put Brut deodorant in the changing rooms. Swinley is now where I play most of my rubbish golf but I have been a member down at Sandwich for 41 years.

Awaiting your response to the terrorist peril at Luton and to easyJet’s data protection policy,

Yours sincerely,

Jamie Summers